Category Archives: Goldfinger
Mister Bond’s Little Black Book:
Occupation: Personal Pilot
Employer: Auric Enterprises
Ahh Pussy…I remember the first time I laid eyes on this stunning beauty on board Goldfinger’s private jet. I had been drugged and was just coming round, when suddenly from out of the inky blackness came this blonde vision pointing a gun at me. “Who are you?” I said. “My name is Pussy Galore.” came the reply. “I must be dreaming!” I quipped coolly.
Pussy Galore, the very name has had many grown men and school boys alike snickering into the back of their hand. In the crazy world of espionage ‘exotic’ names are common place. Let’s face it, a name like ‘Brenda Harris’ just wouldn’t cut the mustard in the underworld now would it? So, it’s with some affection I fill in my first Little Black Book entry with the enigmatic Miss Galore.
The leader of the self monikered Pussy Galore’s Flying Circus, Pussy was in the employ of modern day King Midas, Auric Goldfinger, a fat nutjob obsessed with all things golden. Pussy was training a bevy of blonde beauties to carry out the aerial delivery of the Delta 9 nerve gas over Fort Knox during ‘Operation Grand Slam’.
I suspected that Pussy (snicker) was a lesbian. I thought this because she said she was “immune from my charm” on Goldfinger’s jet. I’ve always enjoyed a challenge being stud muffin and I could tell at a glance she was up for a bit of ‘Bonding’.
Pussy caught me eavesdropping on Goldfinger’s plan to irradiate the US gold reserve in Fort Knox, I was hiding under a giant model at the time seeing if there was any available totty in Goldfinger’s briefing. This icy encounter would be followed later by a playful roll in the hay barn and a rousing judo session. Goldfinger HAD ordered Pussy to ‘entertain’ me for the afternoon (no snickering at the back), and one thing led to another. What can I say, I AM expected to sacrifice myself for the good of the mission.
I didn’t put a hair out-of-place or wrinkle my grey three-piece Saville Row suit as you would expect in our hay barn tryst. Having said that; I did get hay in places a gentleman only discusses with his tailor. Oh, the things I do for England!
Somehow that sexy romp, and a little pat on backside, did the trick. God I’m good. Even possible lesbians hear rapture’s and repent to the side of good after getting their hands on Mister Bond’s ‘gadgets’. Job done.
Pussy switched the Delta 9 nerve gas and ultimately betrayed Goldfinger to my friend Felix Leiter of the CIA. After despatching Goldfinger on board his crashing private jet (I did warn him about firing guns in planes), we bailed out. Pussy and I then enjoyed a ‘post mission debriefing’. But that’s another story…
I guess Miss Galore wasn’t immune from my charms after all and I never did find where she kept the gold knuckles in THAT outfit. Mmm, Pussy…
Little Black Book Notes:
Double Entendre Rating: 10 Sex Appeal: 8 Feisty Index: 7 Scream Factor: 0